MGM Aria, Las Vegas

Via The Las Vegas Sun:

The centerpiece of CityCenter — the Aria Resort & Casino — will open Wednesday, marking a day of grand opening celebrations for the $8.5 billion project…

…The 4,004-room resort and casino will feature more than 150,000 square feet of gaming space, a 215,000-square-foot pool area with 50 cabanas and an 80,000-square-foot spa, the largest among MGM Mirage properties.

The resort also will include 10 bars and lounges, and 16 restaurants. Aria will be home to Cirque du Soleil’s newest show, “Viva Elvis,” which takes guests on a trip through Elvis Presley’s life and music, with first performances beginning Friday.

Until Wednesday, VIPs and company executives will be testing the waters at Aria, ensuring the resort is ready for its first public guests.

Don’t fret, we weren’t invited either.

Burger King has released a gut-busting seven-patty Whopper to mark the release of Windows 7. In what may be the most bizarre cross-promotional campaign ever, Microsoft linked up with the fast-food chain to create the ‘Windows 7 Whopper.’

I guess they figure anyone dumb enough to eat this will also buy Windows 7.

This month marks the eleventh anniversary of Agent Smart’s death, and consequently the ninth anniversary of when “schwing” stopped being associated with namers. He was our Austin Powers, our Keith Richards, our Richard Branson. Most of the official record seems to have disappeared from the Web. We found only a brief account of his death:

John Smart, unarmed, shot to death on Oct. 6, 1998 when police fired at least 13 rounds into his Mercedes convertible.

That was a late model Mercedes convertible. According to published reports at the time, he was stopped in San Francisco (our fair city) for suspicion of either soliciting a prostitute or drugs or both. Police said that Smart tried to run them down, at which point his legend was eternalized. For a full, rollicking year afterwards, namers of every ilk had to add extra memory to their Palm Pilots just to handle the overflow from their social calendars.

But that equity has faded, and it’s time for another high-ranking naming superstar from a big San Francisco shop to go out in a blaze of glory. We’d happily volunteer, if we thought Igor would rate better than a small mention on page eight of the San Francisco Chronicle. No, it must be someone from a page one agency, an agency like Landor. Any takers? Mr. Wrench?

Usually.